Phobias and Me

I have experienced at least 6 different types of phobias.

1. Fear of Spiders (Arachnophobia)

2. Fear of Dogs

3. Fear of Heights

4. Fear of Shots

5. Fear of Enclosed Space

6. Fear of Dentist

I fear spiders since I was a kid. The merely thought of them sent shivers down my spine (like I have any). When I saw one, I just froze, tremble with fear and even have shortness of breath. Most of the time, I just cried. The irony of it is that, these creatures seemed to know that I FEARED them. They would just crawl towards me, jump on my back, and even appear in bathrooms WHEREVER I go. And the best part is that, they came in different sizes, different species, different colours and God knows if they come with different type of venom. The problem with having this kind of phobia is that I imagined that they would bite me.

Recently, I received a few emails of stories about small venomous spiders hiding under toilet seats in Singapore, Malaysia and even Thailand, which have caused the death of several women. Nowadays, I would make it a habit to always lift the toilet seats first before using them and check the toilets for spiders before using them. I hate it when I'm taking a shower and there's a naughty hairy spider looking down at me with its (juling) eyes wide open.

I love animals. But I fear dogs and spiders. I would not hurt them or even try to kill them, but I would simply avoid them at all costs. Even when I passed by dogs on leashes, I would sweat, freeze, get dizzy and my hands would tremble with fear. I even feel nauseous when I hear dogs bark and howl continuously. I have a fear of heights since I was a toddler and able to walk. Last time, when I have to cross an overhead bridge with my family, I would grip my mum's fingers so tightly that my mum would slap me. Nowadays, I have learned to overcome the fear of heights, after forcing myself to go para sailing, bungee jumping, roller coaster rides, walk on bridges and look down from tall buildings. I do sometimes feel lightheaded when I am going down steep staircases but I always tell myself to be brave and overcome it.

Not only that, I fear injection shots, dentists and even enclosed space. I can't stand being in a crowded train, crowded elevators and even crowded shopping malls. I would be anxious and feel stressed up and sweat, even if its air-conditioned. Lock me up in small storeroom and I would end up having panic attacks and faint.

Whenever I'm faced with all these phobias, I experience shortness of breath, pounding heart and accelerated heart rate, chest pain and discomfort, trembling or shaking, sweating, nausea and stomach distress, dizzy, unsteady, lightheaded and faint, numbness, fear of dying, hot and cold flashes.

The best treatment for myself, I think is exposure therapy. In each of these situations, the fear is faced long enough, with support and increasing awareness of control that the panic and anxiety begin to go away with the help of relaxation techniques.

I have to been brave enough to overcome the fear of injections, dentists and heights so far.

But exposing myself to spiders?

Forget it.